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Six Blind Elephants
Andreas
 

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            However, a frown can also mean concentration, puzzlement, or even gas in the stomach, so some of these signals are still somewhat ambiguous. In the same way, a sigh can imply boredom, but it can also mean relaxation or pleasure. Raised eyebrows can mean surprise or disbelief, but if the head is tilted forward, it usually implies a request for the other to respond, while if it is combined with a backward and sideways tilt of the head, it can imply a sexual innuendo. In face-to-face communication there will always be many messages that are conveyed nonverbally. Some of them will be clear digital signals, while others will be ambiguous, and some will have meaning only in a particular context. Most of these nonverbal messages are unconscious, and we typically respond to them unconsciously as well.
            Since we usually respond to nonverbal implications unconsciously, we can use them to gracefully and indirectly elicit responses in others. For instance, think about what you do nonverbally when you want to end a conversation but don't want to do it overtly. You can defocus your eyes, or look away briefly, turn your body slightly away, take a short step to one side, lean back a bit, run your fingers through your hair, end a sentence with a downward inflection indicating completion, etc. Most of these behaviors don't have distinct meanings that are culturally agreed upon, so they can only be understood using implication.
            One of the more difficult things about living in another culture (even if you know the language well) is that we can no longer "read" many of the nonverbal implications, leaving us uncertain about what is being communicated beyond the words that are spoken.
            Our possessions and surroundings are also scopes that are full of implications. A prominent clock on the wall at work implies the importance of time, and its absence, a more relaxed attitude. The large desk, view window and other furnishings in the boss' office imply his importance, in contrast to the plain desk of a worker in a windowless cubicle. Our clothes imply volumes about our concerns (or lack of them) about neatness, comfort, style, wealth, lifestyle and attitude.
            The larger context of your communication, your clothing, your nonverbal behavior - speech, pauses, tonal patterns, posture, gestures, etc. - all contribute to the meaning of what you say and do. Contextual implication is always a factor in every moment of communication, whether you intend it or not. When you are aware of all this, you can make sure that all aspects of the context support what you want to accomplish.
            Once I knew a woman who was troubled by incessant critical internal voices, which disturbed her and kept her from fully attending to real-world events. Her spiritual teacher told her to get a job chopping vegetables in a Chinese restaurant, where vegetables are chopped very fast with a very large and very sharp knife. That is a context in which there is very strong motivation to pay close attention to the knife; it would be quite dangerous to be distracted by internal dialogue, which quickly diminished.
            A mother always spoke up and answered for her anorexic daughter when Erickson asked the daughter questions, and he wanted to hear what the daughter had to say. He told the mother to get out her lipstick and mirror and hold it very close to her lips and notice how her lips tended to move when he asked the daughter questions. Putting on lipstick is a context in which the lips are kept motionless-and therefore unable to speak. Erickson's instruction was much more graceful than asking the mother to shut up so that he could hear what the daughter had to say.
            You can also change someone's internal context. With several women who were incontinent due to spinal injuries, and who wanted to regain control of their elimination, Erickson put them into trance, and then had them experience sitting on the toilet, and then imagine the bathroom door opening and a strange man's

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